yes...

A couple of things... first, I hate election time. I love what it's about, but I hate the political manueverings and political slime that seems to flow out their mouths like so much human waste slushing around a waste treatment plant. I'm starting to lose faith in the authenticity and goodness of these men and women (and I use that term very loosely), ultimately, they can't even uphold a simple promise to keep their campaigns free from the vitriolic rhetoric that they seem to love so much.

Sometimes, I wish Boone was running for president, I know for sure I can trust him.

Second, I have been really nervous for the last week. The last week has felt like 3 weeks all crammed into one week! It's not been any busier than normal, it's just that I found out last week that a particular pastor from Iowa is coming to the Upstate/Greenville area for a retreat/interview.
This normally would be fun, and I'm really trying to let it be fun and be myself... but, I haven't been. I've been stressing about it and since I have made it a point not to stress about anything, I'm being confronted with a set of feelings that I don't know how to handle all that well. If it wasn't for the fact that I feel like I'm in a constant state of wanting to yack all over the place, I don't think anyone would see any noticable difference in my countenance. My poor wife has had to put up with me this whole time (which only serves to remind me of how much of a blessing she is to me), somehow I'm always suprised by the fact that I feel sick as a dog after eating any meals no matter how meager or plain they may be. Gently, she reminds me that It's probably nerves and I'll be OK if I stop obsessing over the things I can't have any influence over. I guess that's why the Lord made us for each other.
I'm at starbucks (fivebucks as Dave calls it) drinking my... well, I was drinking my iced Passion Tea w/ 5 pumps of melon syrup, it's finished now. I've been going over questions to ask this pastor in an effort to better understand the church he's coming from and the Youth ministry they have. (maybe I should back this truck up and fill in some blanks...

...Misti and I feel called to youth ministry
...I have pursued this call to YM
...Church in Iowa called me and my references
...Pastor in Iowa seemed like a really cool guy that I could potentially work well with.
...Pastor in Iowa asked if it'd be Ok to visit with me while taking his miniretreat in Greenville.
...Next day he told me he had tickets to come to Greenville.
I think that pretty much sums it up.)

I've done as much as possible to keep my head and heart here in Greenville, to not project myself to a place that I'm not, to brace myself for rejection or acceptance... basically, to live content to worship God wherever he would position Misti and I so that we could work with laser intensity for His purposes, even if that means staying in Greenville indefinately. Still... it's not an easy prospect.
Well, after all this stressing and all these requests for prayer; after a week of being very aware of all my own personal failings and inadequicies I was confronted with comfort, assurance, confidence, and excitement for meeting this pastor. For the first time since he suggested coming down I don't feel apprehensive or nervous... I feel ready to show him who I am, and I can't tell you how proud I am of what he's going to see. (that probably sounds conceated, it's really not. The Lord's just done a ton of work in me and I've been stoked to watch it all happen. I can't wait to show it off a little.)